Spoilleriffic. If you haven’t seen the first episode of Season Two of Doctor Who, look away now.

First episode of the new series – and we’re ripping off stuff from the beginning of episode two. Huh. It does vaguely look like they’re trying to use old props and such they had lying around.

Especially the revisiting of old characters. Not entirely convinced that Cassandra was sufficiently interesting to revisit.

Nor am I convinced that in the year five billion and twenty-odd the concept of “Chav” is still extant, or that Cassandra would have access to a 20th Century film projector, with film of a 20th century (looking) party starring herself. Five billion years is more than the time it took for life on Earth to go from it’s very beginnings to, well, us. Arguements over whether we are the pinnacle of evolution aside, five billion years from now is time enough for our stomach flora to evolve sentience. It’s unreasonable to assume that anything vaguely human would still be around.

And apparently, espite what they said in “Last Human”, there are apparenly tons of human-ish people around – with enough memory of Earth to build a city called “New New York”. After five billion years. Right.

And our Doctor can tell that a cure is going to come about in the year five billion and a thousand, as opposed five billion and twenty-odd.

And the Doctor is referred to as being a “Wandering God”?! And he seems to be taking that seriously? Setting himself up as the one moral authority? Odd.

And that bloody tease of a Face of Boe! Grrr! “I’ll just drag you five billion years into the future, just to tell you I’m not going to tell you anything!” Pillock.

And, as usual, the single 45-minute episode has to be rushed to get everything in by the end. There were very interesting concepts in there, that I think could have done with a bit more discussion – the idea of cloning humans to act as essentially medical supplies has a lot of ethical implications, even before they suddenly achieve sentience (and language, somehow, despite being locked up in a green tube from birth).

Cat make-up is nice, though. The usual good production values, although I didn’t like the New (new new new etc.) New Yor shots. Billie Piper does a very good job of differentiating between being Rose and being Cassandra. David Tennent has a little bit too much fun when he gets a go

And now the bloody sound’s gone out! Argh! But at least all I’m missing is the drippy “Cassandra suddenly goes all nice just in time to die” ending. Bah. “I must live! I must live! Oh, now I’m in this body, I don’t mind dying!”

I suspect I’m letting my irritation with the “year five billion” thing cloud my enjoyment of what is otherwise a solid New Doctor Who episode. And that’s the important thing – New Doctor Who!

Oh, well, next week is Victorian werewolves. And mad Victorian kung-fu monks. Huh.
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